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I had admired the colors in a halved specimen, from the dark green outer leaves to the pale yellow inner ones that were often edged with lavender, but I had never before noticed the delicate structure of those receding caves that now pulled my eye into the vegetable heart.

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We lamented the demise of the tourist trade as I wandered over to the front window and looked down on Ocean Avenue; Carmel's main street was empty and silent. How silly to have agonized over how big my hips were when I could see from the photographs that they were just the right size breaats the rest of me. As the day wore on, we established such a warm and easy relationship that when Edward passed close to me to adjust the burlap screen he used for a background, I half-expected a friendly pat.

Perhaps no preparation is possible for such a shock to the senses.

However, it wouldn't satisfy the gossip-minded custodians of the town's morals, who looked on Sonya as Edward's wife. He gpasses glasses when he peered down into the Graflex hood to focus, but he wanted them instantly out of the way when he looked over at me. There was a hot plate for making coffee, and Edward soon bought two yellow pottery mugs for our private use.

My disappointment over the change in plans was balanced by the realization that, away from the disturbing presence of the picture maker, I would be able to concentrate on the photographs more completely. When fading light reminded us of passing time and other commitments, we tried to look objectively at our new situation. An almost steady stream of encouragement and appreciation issued from behind the camera: "That's great! My early departures were never questioned at home, even though I had always been a notorious morning sluggard; my family did not make a habit of confiding, and they assumed I was going to the dress shop to catch up on the books.

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I was his amor, his alma, his corazon, his Charisita or Sita for short. The studio looked a tittle different, because the couch had been pulled out into the middle of the room; the 4 X 5 Graflex, mounted on a sturdy wooden tripod, stood before it.

During the day I have told a tree, Six little rabbits and a flock of quail, And three cows sleeping beside the road, And four trucks, driving south through the fog, Lgasses a white cat on another hill. I climbed the steep outside staircase and walked down a short hall to the studio, where Sonya gave me a friendly welcome.

Sonya asked ley if I had done any posing, and I said I had, but only for sketching classes with my clothes on. Once or twice there were faces visible, but even without such clues to personality, the nudes retained a strong sense of individuality. From these we drank a ceremonial morning cup as early light warned of the advent of shopkeepers and the time for my departure. When I asked to see some of Sonya's photographs she begged off, saying that she was in the midst of reprinting her work on a different paper because she was dissatisfied with the snqp been getting.

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God how much it means when it is as easy and delightful to laugh at oneself as it is to laugh at another Much of my understanding of art had been gained as a frequent guest in the Hollywood home of Walter and Louise Arensberg, where, as a teenager, I had wandered through rooms filled with modern masters that included Rousseau, Duchamp, Klee, Matisse, Picasso. A limited association with secretarial school had failed to clear up the mysteries of double-entry bookkeeping; my ability to keep track of the dress shop's business was due less to my supposed office skills than to an exceptionally good memory, and that particular faculty had become endangered.

After all this loosening up I looked for a change in Edward's behavior, but he remained as circumspect as before, and I realized that his reputation as a Lothario was wildly exaggerated. At break time Edward produced a bottle of wine and we drank to a post-Depression future in which making a living would once more be a reasonable expectation rather than a dismal unlikelihood.

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Now I saw clearly that my height was just what it should be. The sight of this amazing human being striding along as if he could have been just anyone gave me the satisfying sense of having a great secret.

I was again struck, as I had been at the concert, by his absolute naturalness. The studio was drafty, so when we took breaks at half-hour intervals I wrapped my bathrobe around me and we sat close to glassex small wood stove to talk. If I was to be rejected on thatI wanted it to happen at once.

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While she was getting them out, I surveyed the big, loftlike room. We confessed our mutual shame at having tried and failed to give up smoking.

At first I tried to snnap on the pictures as we went along, but I was soon reduced to occasional exclamations as one overwhelming image supplanted another. Ignoring Edward's offer of the bathroom off the entrance hall as a changing room, I undressed while we were talking and hung my bathrobe over my shoulders, thus making sure Edward had full glssses to view the still-angry spider of an appendix scar that marred my abdomen.

He needed glasses when he peered down into the Graflex hood to focus, but he wanted them instantly out of the way when he looked over at me.

I learned to avoid snap judgments and superficial comments so as not to disappoint Walter, who never seemed to lack an original view--or maybe several--of every picture he looked ,exico. He did not pose or make faces or witty remarks, outlets for tension I might have employed.

We found we had enjoyed or disliked many of the same books, movies, and people, and that we both admired F. Sonya asked me if I had done any posing, and I said I had, but only for sketching classes with my clothes on. But they knew I never glassses any more And thought I was lying about the rest.